The Courage to Exit
By Evelyn Chen

At the end of last month, one of my colleagues tendered his resignation in search of better opportunities. It shocked the whole lot of us; he had been a fixture in the company for so long and seemed entirely comfortable in his role.

Naturally, a group of us approached him, curious about such a life-changing decision. While he shared many reasons, the most striking thing was the immediate transformation in his demeanour. The change was almost visceral, the tension in his face had evaporated, replaced by a look of profound relief. He appeared lighter, relaxed and finally at peace.

It got me thinking: what many people don’t tell us is that it is okay to put ourselves first. We are often swallowed whole by a corporate world of high-octane stress, relentless workloads and unending meetings. We wake up worried and we go to bed anxious, repeating this cycle for years. If we aren’t careful, we will remain in this state of perpetual exhaustion until the day we die.

So, how do we break the cycle? The most sustainable approach is stress management, though I know that is easier said than done. For responsible, passionate people, “switching off” feels impossible. We don’t have the mental bandwidth to let go of work we view as valuable.

I have read countless books on managing stress that suggest “talking it out” with those causing the pressure. But let’s be honest; we live in Asia. We aren’t culturally conditioned to have those blunt, difficult conversations with our superiors. Even if we muster the courage, the risk of it being poorly received is high, often leaving a bad taste in everyone’s mouth and causing the relationship to go south.

The other alternative? Walking away. Plain and simple. No more heartache, no more sleepless nights, just a clean break.

I truly admire my colleague’s courage. So many of us are tethered by a sense of loyalty; we fret over the boss, the company, the product and the teammates we would leave behind. However, a wise person recently reminded me that loyalty is a two-way street. If you are genuinely appreciated, you wouldn’t spend your nights questioning whether you belong.

Seeing the sheer peace on his face made me realise that “walking away” isn’t an act of giving up or a sign of weakness. Instead, it is perhaps the ultimate act of self-preservation. It is a reminder that while our roles in a company are replaceable, our health and our time are not.

Sometimes, the most professional thing we can do for ourselves is to simply choose a different path and walk it with our heads held high.

xx

 

Vocabulary Gallery

Tethered: Tied or restricted by a rope or chain; figuratively, being held back by obligations.

Self-preservation: The protection of oneself from harm or emotional exhaustion.

Demeanour: A person’s outward behaviour or bearing.

Bandwidth: The mental capacity or resources needed to handle a situation.

Sustainable: Able to be maintained at a certain rate or level without causing exhaustion.

Visceral: Relating to deep inward feelings rather than to the intellect; a “gut” reaction.

Perpetual: Never ending or changing; occurring repeatedly.

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